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Assertiveness Training and how it can help you
Being assertive is something you may normally consider confident people do naturally. If you are trying to
improve your confidence as a step towards overcoming depression then assertiveness training could really help you.
Learning to act and speak in a more assertive way could help you overcome several other obstacles in your life such
as shyness, low self esteem and a lack of confidence.
What is assertiveness exactly?
Some mistakenly think that being assertive means being pushy or selfish in order to get your own way but this is
not true and is an extremely misguided view. Assertive behaviour is positive and will bring you results in your
dealings with others. Not being assertive is one way to cultivate low confidence, self esteem and worse. If you are
an assertive person you will be confident to stand up and be counted, you will put your opinion forward and stand
by it. You will not be quiet and go ignored. Normally because of the perceived risk involved in expressing yourself
openly like this rather than keeping quiet means you need a certain level of confidence. If you want to conquer
shyness or become more effective socially you need to be more assertive. Simply put, assertiveness is asking for
what you want or speaking up for yourself when you feel strongly that you have something to say.
Why is being assertive important to you?
- Relationships - expressing your feelings and being able to ask what you want means you will be happier in
your relationships and this is more likely to make for a happier partner.
- Career - those who are passive at work are often undervalued and ignored for promotion. It is those who put
themselves forward and ask for responsibility that are given it. Being more assertive will bring you better
opportunities and more job satisfaction.
- Family - it is important to compromise whether you are a son, daughter or parent but it is also important
to be assertive in decisions where you need to state what you want. Women are especially in need of being more
assertive or the demands on them can be unbearable.
- Friendships - any friendship should be on an equal footing. When one person starts to demand too much of
the other it is time to reassess that friendship. Being assertive and telling your friend honestly what you
think is very important and being passive can make you very unhappy.
- Success and ambitions - if you set yourself any goal you will need to be assertive with others who may try
to dissuade you or stand in your way. Again, being assertive just means declaring your intention to do
something and claiming your right to be what you want to be.
- Self esteem - if you are passive and feel that you have not spoken up for yourself in any situation, not
only may you lose out but you will feel terrible inside. This feeling may even cause you to lose confidence and
if it continues could even lead to depression.
Assertiveness is a positive quality! Beware though, some will tell you being assertive is being selfish. Not so.
As long as your assertiveness does not hurt anyone else and as long as you state your wishes calmly and confidently
you are not acting selfishly. You have a right to be yourself and do what you feel is right for you. Selfishness is
when you don't care about others, only yourself. What being assertive is all about is respect for yourself and this
will also reflect outwards as you begin to respect others as having equal rights as you.
If you are interested in becoming more assertive and reaping the benefits that you will find as a result then I
would suggest that you get this helpful program which will transform the way you behave and change you for
the better download the assertiveness training self-hypnosis program now and
start to improve the quality of your life!
© 2006 Karl Perera all rights reserved
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